Updated: Sep 15
I read this and couldn't say it better Myself! So well written and spot on. So from now on I will require a £25 deposit, no exceptions! I have wasted too much time and energy on wankers and no shows. Thanks to all the real subs out there, who are respectful and don't waste My time 💜
The price of a Dominatrix
If the idea of meeting a professional Dominatrix that interests you, you are probably wondering why we charge such a high hourly rate. (I charge between £75-£150 for 30 mins-1hr, higher prices are for forced bi, kidnapping etc. Go to any Domme in any big city and you will pay £2-400 an hour) Is it all about money for us ? The short answer is no, not at all. The more comprehensive answer is also no, but requires some explanation. Here are various reasons why our hourly rate is so high.
The equipment of a donjon is very lexpensive. A single piece of furniture can cost thousands of dollars. A handcrafted, good-quality flogger costs at least € 100. The price of a single tail whip starts around € 200, a good quality dildo around € 50. Most reputable Professional Dominatrixes have large collections of these items and more.. Leather handcuffs, balaclavas, nipple clamps, chains, paddles ... the list is long.
You like to see us wearing fabulous outfits, well-cut dresses, latex, leather and lace. Quality silk tights and lingerie are expensive and need to be replaced regularly. I have a large wardrobe dedicated to fetishes so that every time we meet, I can wear a new gorgeous outfit that you can admire, and I am constantly adding pieces to my collection.
And then there are also our shoes ...
You like fetish outfits ?
Condoms, lube, disposable gloves, and cleaning products are a monthly expense that most people don't think about. I estimate, on average, for one session, I use a minimum of 10-20 gloves, more if there is a lot of anal play or MedFet.
All my toys are soaked in a solution to sterilize them before and after each use. All dildos, even if they are sterile, will have a condom.
When entering the bathroom, you will find a small toiletry kit that includes a disposable enema bulb, a razor, a toothbrush, and of course a clean towel. Small expenses that add up.
Speaking of towels, you can't know how much laundry we do ! Towels, sheets, rags galore. One session = one load of laundry (see more). And no, I don't have a domestic slave doing it. My requirements are way too high to entrust anyone else with my cleaning.
The play space
Having a place dedicated to play is very expensive, especially in big cities. Unfortunately in Paris, renting a dungeon is not possible, if it was, it would cost at least € 50 per hour (and I think I'm being conservative with this figure). I'll let you do the math, taking into consideration one of our biggest expenses, taxes.
Most professional Domme friends famous people pay their taxes. This means that a huge percentage of what we earn goes to the state. I am not complaining. I appreciate all the social protection I have in France, most 24% of my income goes directly to the state.
Although we pay our taxes, we cannot deduct our many expenses like other businesses. Therefore, all the money we spend on the equipment mentioned above is not considered a business expense.
You like our pretty photos? A shoot costs between 100 and 300 € (or more) to 10-15 images. Site hosting, publicity, site administration services, the costs of sites like OnlyFans or AVN ... These are not necessarily huge expenses, but it adds up at the end of the month. Remember that I am a business and have the same expenses as other small businesses.
Time outside of sessions
Administration and emails
For each application that I accept, I refuse two (quality and not quantity for me). I always take the time to answer emails, even if it’s to refuse a session with someone. It may not seem like much, but it accumulates quite quickly. Regular communication with my clients takes time, whether through my newsletter, SMS, or emails. Once again, this is a business and like others, I do my best to build a relationship with my clients.
More, there are a lot of wankers who contact us. Fantastists who just want to exchange a few emails but will never intend to book a session. Others who deliberately want to waste our time (who knows why?!). When I still took phone calls and texts, I was overwhelmed by these guys. It was only since I restricted my booking process (and learned to smell them a mile away) that it started to be less of a problem for me, but nonetheless it still happens and eats up my precious time.
Post on social networks takes a MONSTERY time. Think about how you found my site. Surely thanks to Twitter or Google, right ? If I didn't spend hours a week creating and posting content, you would never have found me.
Writing articles on my site takes time. Doing my accounting takes time. Writing my newsletter takes time. Editing photos and videos takes time. On average, for each hour spent in session, I spend at least three hours doing administrative work, and again I do not take into consideration the time spent uploading photos to sites like LoyalFans or AVN.
Preparation of sessions and cleaning
For those who have already met me in session, you know my play space is spotless. The floor does not clean itself and since you will probably be on your hands 4 and knees, I want to make sure there is no unwanted dirt on it. Before a session, I re-clean all the toys I plan to use. For those who have already done sessions with me, have you ever noticed that everything was already out and that wasn't rummaging in my drawers looking for objects ? There is a reason for this ! Everything that touches your body has been cleaned thoroughly in advance.
And then my hair, my makeup, and my outfit because when you arrive, I want to be as gorgeous in person as I am in my photos and videos.
Cleaning after a session takes a considerable amount of time. After a good session, it often looks like a tornado has ravaged my playroom. Everything I have used must be washed before putting it away, and once again the floor, door handles and equipment (yes, before AND after the session).
We weren't born knowing how handle a whip risk-free singletail. The ability to lead a submissive in subspace with just a look or a few words takes years to learn.. Knowing how to care for someone going through an incredibly intense time requires emotional stability and knowledge..
Most of us received extensive training before starting the profession of Professional Dominatrix, either through our lifestyle or by training with other pros. Personally, I already had a decade of experience in BDSM before I went pro. I frequented events (and still do), I watched other people play, I read books and articles not only on how to play safely but also on the psychology of BDSM. I have invested in online and in-person workshops, attended festivals, and asked questions. I still do, and continue to improve my knowledge by various means.
The value of my time
Highly skilled workers are expensive, whatever the field. If you have to change the roof of your house, you could do it for cheap. But will there be problems in the future ? You can have a haircut for not much but will you wince every time you see yourself in a mirror? ?
A lot of people tell me if I lower my rates, I will have more reservations. It may be true, but I want quality and not quantity, and I think the same is true for clients who come to consult me. What I offer is a luxury service, and I charge what I think I deserve. I offer my intimate energy (in addition to all the things I have already listed) and if you want to access that, you will have to comply with my requirements.
Is consulting a pro dominatrix only for the rich ? Absolutely not, but to people extremely motivated and dedicated. Some of my clients save for months to spend a few hours with me and I love it. It shows that they are willing to make sacrifices for an experience that will stay with them for a long time..
I did not write this article to justify my prices. I wrote it for those of you who don't appreciate the work that we do.. Hope some of you stop thinking that sex work is easy money. I think most of my clients already understand the pride I take from my work and understand that it is just that: work. It's a job that I love, even the less fun and glamorous parts. I'm lucky enough to make a living doing something I'm passionate about. Not everyone can say that, regardless of the sector of activity.
Those of you who appreciate what we do both during and outside of sessions, you are precious and we adore you.